Menstruation is a completely normal part of being a woman, but it can also be an extremely stressful and painful experience. In one particular instance, the intensity of these emotions caused a female student to shout at her teacher in front of the entire class, using what the school considers to be "graphic and vulgar language."
Speaking Up
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In a post on the AITA ("Am I the A--hole?") subreddit, a 17-year-old female student details an incident involving her male teacher at school, which led to her being assigned a week-long detention.
The cause of her punishment seems to be her straightforwardness when discussing her need to bring her bag to the bathroom for changing her pad.
Super Strict with the Girls
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In her post, the student shares that her former 50-year-old school teacher, whom she refers to as Mr. Miller (even though his first name is Steven,) is extremely strict towards girls at school. Additionally, he has a “ special hatred” for students who ditch classes.
Bag Ban
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Due to an incident involving some students in her class who used the bathroom as an excuse to leave and never returned, he implemented a policy forbidding students from taking their bags with them.
The teacher’s reasoning behind this policy is that if students leave their bags behind, they will be forced to return to retrieve them. “As you can imagine, this rule has been so frustrating for the girls in the class,” remarked the student.
No Pockets To Fit Menstrual Supplies
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The girl points out that the majority of women's clothing doesn’t come with big enough pockets to accommodate a pad or tampon. To cope with this issue, she has resorted to wearing bulky hoodies and storing her pads in the front pocket.
However, due to the recent heatwave and the inadequate air conditioning in her school, she chose not to wear a hoodie on Thursday.
Breaking the Rules
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Approximately halfway through Mr. Miller's class, the girl raised her hand and requested permission to use the bathroom. He granted her permission, and she stood up with her bag, hoping that he wouldn't take notice. But, he did indeed notice her carrying the bag.
“He ‘reminded’ me, in that condescending way that older teachers talk down to teens, that I had to leave my bag in the classroom,” she continues.
Tension Rises In the Classroom
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When she told her teacher, "Sorry, I need it," he responded bluntly, saying, “I don’t care, I make the rules in this classroom. Please go to the bathroom without your backpack or sit down.”
In response to her begging, “C’mon please, I need my bag," Mr. Miller asked her with a hint of annoyance, “Why in the world could you possibly need your backpack?”
The Breaking Point
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Frustrated and feeling an urgent need to use the bathroom, she shouted at the teacher in front of the whole class, “Because I need a pad to soak up the blood that comes out of my vag..na, STEVE.”
Filled with anger, the girl then stormed out of the classroom, carrying her bag over her shoulder.
“I Would Normally Never Say What I Said”
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The girl asserts that she would never say what she said, as she is usually “very private” when it comes to discussing her period and menstrual products.
She clarifies, “I was really frustrated and needed to use the bathroom really badly.”
Facing the Consequences
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Upon exiting the bathroom, she found herself intercepted in the hallway by a guidance counselor who immediately took her to the office. They contacted her parents and imposed a punishment of one full week of after-school detention for "use of graphic and vulgar language and unauthorized walkout."
However, her mother was able to negotiate it down to just two sessions because she’s typically a “very good student” and this was her first offense at school.
Second Guessing Her Actions
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Even though she didn't consider her words "vulgar," the girl's sister still blamed her for causing a scene in the classroom, reminding her that it was Mr. Miller's class and she should respect his rules.
After her sister accused her of "making a mountain out of a molehill," the girl who spoke out in class was left feeling uncertain about her actions. She started to question herself and sought answers as to whether she was truly in the wrong for standing up for her needs.
“Shame On the School”
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Upon reading her story, the online community sided with the young girl and expressed profound outrage at the teacher's behavior, particularly his refusal to allow girls to take their bags to the bathroom and his inability to tolerate the use of "anatomically accurate terms" in the classroom.
Some even went suggested that if they were in the girl's position, they would approach the school's biology teacher to question the obvious contradiction: if the anatomical terms were considered “vulgar,” why were they being taught in schools, and if they weren’t, why was the girl punished for using them?
His or Her Problem?
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“You didn’t use graphic and vulgar language imo, you stated exactly what happens in a female body,” stated one user. “If your male teacher is too fragile to handle that, that’s his problem, not yours. Absolutely NTA.”
“Fight This”
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“Since when is human biology vulgar and offensive? This is some straight-up s.xism sh.t,” commented another individual. “You need to go back to the school and ask them for a list of the ‘appropriate’ terms they’d like people to use to describe menstruation and request they post them in every classroom so students know what correct terms to use.”
“Would they prefer you say you’re excreting menstrual fluid? That your uterus is shedding? Please do tell! This is crap. If you have the energy, fight this.”
“Misogynistic” Teacher
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Some individuals pointed fingers at the mother, suggesting that she should have taken a stronger stance in support of her daughter.“I would have fought for no punishment for my kids,” one user expressed.
“If I needed I would have gone to the school board. Any school Fb pages? I would post there too. Your mom should have gone to bat for you. I am sure you aren’t the only one being punished because of this misogynistic AH.”
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