He Thought Everyone Used a "Poop Knife," But It Turned Out to Be a Family Secret

It's not uncommon for families to have unique habits that are exclusive to them or not widely practiced. However, not realizing that your family's behavior is unusual can sometimes lead to embarrassing situations, such as requesting a 'poop knife' at a friend's house and, resulting in everyone laughing at you.

In a story shared by @redditonwikipod, a man says that he had no idea that some people don't use a poop knife. This led to an awkward moment when he asked his friend for one while in the bathroom and became the subject of laughter for everyone.

“I was 22 years old when I learned that not every family has poop knife,” the video opens with the man stating,

“I’m I'm in shock. A poop knife?” another one exclaims. 

“My family poops big,” he explains, “maybe it's genetic, maybe it's our diet, but everyone births giant logs of crap.”

The man goes o to provide a thorough explanation for why one might need a special knife for dealing with feces.

“If anyone has laid a mega poop, you know that sometimes it won't flush, lays across the hole in the bottom of the bowl, and the vortex of draining water merely gives it a spin as it mocks you.”

He shares that this was a common occurrence in his family when he was growing up, to the extent that they had a poop knife. It was an old, rusty kitchen knife that hung on a nail in the laundry room, reserved exclusively for that purpose.

“No, this is the weirdest sh..t ever,” one interrupted him in the midst of his detailed explanation. 

While the other person found the concept of a 'poop knife' weird, the man who shared the story thought nothing unusual about it, explaining, “It was normal to walk through the hallway and have someone call out, ‘hey, can you get me the poop knife?’”

“I thought it was a standard kit. You have your plunger, your toilet brush, and your poop knife.”

The other person had a simple solution to the problem and suggested, “Just use the plunger, right?’

The man remembers being at a friend's house - a local dealer and always had guests over – and feeling the need to relieve himself after a day or two of not being able to go,  so he excused himself to “lay a gigantic turd.”

As luck would have it, the man found himself in a situation where he needed a poop knife while using the bathroom at his friend's house, “I look down and see that it's a sideways one,” he says, “So I crack the door and call out my friend. He arrives and I ask him for his poop knife.”

Also read: 21 of the Biggest Lies in American History

But his friend was unfamiliar with the term and couldn't understand what he was asking for. 'Oh what?' he responded."

“Your poop knife…I need to use it please,” he tried to explain.

“What the f..ck is a poop knife?” his friend asked.

Finding it hard to believe that his friend didn’t know the meaning of the term, he thought to himself, “maybe he calls it by a more delicate name. A fecal cleaver? A dumb divider?”

As soon as he explained the purpose of the poop knife, his friend burst out laughing, followed by others in the room. “It also turns out that none of them had poop knives,” he adds.

“It was just my f...ked up family with their f...ked up bowls, f...k my life,” the man concludes.  

His wife also turned out not to know what a poop knife was, which led her to use the old rusty knife hanging in the utility closet as a basic utility knife. Fortunately, she didn't use it for cooking food but only to open Amazon boxes. But as one man in the video noted, “still, that's disgusting.”

The video ends on a humorous note with a valuable piece of advice that could spare the whole family from using a rusty poop knife: “Dude, your whole family needs to be eating more fiber.”

@redditonwikipod #trueoffmychest I Learned Not Everyone Has A 💩 Knife! #redditonwiki #funny #fypシ #reddit_tiktok #redditstories #redditreadings #tifu ♬ original sound - Reddit On Wiki Podcast

READ NEXT:

• 25 Popular Things Women Wear That Men Secretly Hate
• 33 Dirty Company Secrets Revealed By Employees That We Are Not Supposed To Know
• 20 Dangerous Things Your Doctor Wants You to Stop Doing Right Now