The 12-year-old daughter's wish for an expensive swimming pool was granted by her parents, but on the condition that she would repay half of it when she grows up and starts working. When she turned 16, however, she broke her word. This angered her mother, who threatened to take away her car and phone privileges if she didn't pay back the money
“I’m Really Not Sure Anymore”
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Beginning her Reddit post, the OP asserts that she doesn't believe the situation requires a post on Reddit, but decides to do so anyway after her daughter, husband, and several family members accused her of being an "a..hole."
Daughter's Dream
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In her Reddit post, the OP reveals that her daughter, who was 12 at the time, expressed a strong desire for a pool as she loved swimming and promised to use it daily during the summer.
Feeling Left Out
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Another reason her daughter was eager to have a pool is that all of her friends had one, and not having one made her feel left out and unhappy.
Weighing the Cost of a Swimming Pool
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Despite acknowledging that they could afford a swimming pool, the mother expresses concern that pools are very expensive and neither she nor her husband really enjoys swimming, which means that the pool would only be enjoyed by their daughter and could be an unnecessary expense for the family.
But Not So Fast
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The parents didn't want to simply buy their daughter a pool when she asked for it due to the considerable cost of purchasing it. Instead, they wanted their daughter to understand the significant expense of such a purchase.
A Family's Compromise
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After careful consideration, the parents ultimately decided to buy the pool, but not without first establishing an agreement with their 12-year-old daughter.
A Daughter's Promise to Pay
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The parents made a deal with their young daughter that when she grew up and started working, she would have to pay them back for half of the pool.
It’s a Deal
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Not surprisingly, the daughter “quickly agreed” to her parents' deal, as she was only 12 at the time and loved swimming.
Daughter Gets Her First Job
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Four years have passed since the mother and daughter made their agreement about paying back the swimming pool cost. Now, the daughter is 16 and has just started her first job.
Saving for a Dream Dress
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Despite her earlier promise to pay back half of the expensive swimming pool cost, the daughter's interests and priorities have since changed, She is currently working hard to save up enough money to buy a prom dress that she has her heart set on.
A Broken Agreement
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Irritated by her daughter's decision to prioritize a prom dress over paying back half of the swimming pool cost, the mother felt that she had to remind her daughter of the agreement they had made years ago, but to no avail.
Mother's Threats of Privilege Withdrawal Over Pool Repayment
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The mother was clearly not pleased with her daughter's change of heart and demanded that she fulfill her end of the deal. She even went to the extent of threatening to withdraw her daughter's phone and car privileges if she didn't pay them back.
“Now, She Won’t Speak To Me”
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While the mother is upset that her daughter has stopped talking to her due to the disagreement over paying back for the swimming pool, her husband is taking their daughter's side, believing that they couldn't have expected a young child to fully understand and commit to the agreement.
It’s Not About Money
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The mother stresses that making her daughter keep her end of the deal is simply a way of teaching her responsibility and good values, and money is not the main concern.
“For me, this isn’t even about money — it’s about teaching my young daughter the right morals to live life with,“ she asserts.
Fear of Raising an Entitled Child
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The mother also fears that not holding her daughter accountable for the agreement they made could lead to her becoming an entitled adult.
She writes, “I don’t want her to think she can just go around making deals for her benefit and then just not upholding them.”
A Reddit Consensus
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Filled with doubts about whether she was doing the right thing by pushing her daughter to pay back half of the swimming pool cost, the mother turns to the Reddit community for advice; the community's response is a harsh consensus.
“Seriously?”
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A Redditor who voted “YTA” called out the mother for trying to enforce a verbal agreement made with a 12-year-old.
They expressed, “The right morals to live with are that 12-year-olds cannot legally enter contracts. That’s the moral. And just.. very very misguided”
“Dumb idea”
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“Who on earth would make this kind of a deal with a 12-year-old?” questioned another commenter, who pointed out that the daughter's age of 16 was a tender age and the mother's actions were too severe.
“One Of The Most Ridiculous Things I've Read”
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One Redditor expressed disbelief at the mother's expectation, writing, “At first, I thought her end of the deal would be to clean the pool and keep it up, not pay for f..king half of it!” Who in their right mind makes a deal like that with a 12-year-old?!”
They advised, “Unless you're going to give her equity of the house when you sell it in the future, get over yourself with this.”
Parent of Four Shares Advice on Parenting Skills
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Another user was appalled, stating, “You made a deal with a TWELVE-YEAR-OLD for THOUSANDS of DOLLARS?!? Of course YTA.”
They also took the opportunity to offer the mother some advice on parenting skills, “As a parent of FOUR, there are PLENTY of ways to teach our children morals that don’t involve forcing a child to pay for a pool in an agreement she made when she was still in 5th or 6th grade…”
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Source: Reddit