What does it mean to be single by choice? The meaning gets a bit confusing after a while since many other people use this as an excuse whenever they're single for about a couple of minutes. But what does it really mean?
Single by choice means that you don't want to be in a relationship. People who are purposely choosing to be single value their independence. They usually don't feel like they need other people to feel complete or to feel validated.
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The reasons for this lifestyle choice are varied. Let us examine some of them to understand what single by choice really means.
YOU KNOW YOUR WORTH
This is when you have enough self-confidence and self-esteem to be your own person. There is no need to feel dependent on anyone else for your happiness or contentment. You know your worth, and you are one whole of a person. You complete yourself.
YOU WANT TO WORK ON YOURSELF
Contrary to what everyone else seems to think, being single by choice doesn't mean that you're in-between boyfriends. It doesn't even mean that you've experienced devastating heartbreak, and this is why you want to take a break from dating or commitments.
It means that you want to take this time to work on yourself. After all, one should always strive to become a better version of themselves. Perhaps you are confident in your belief that if you want to grow or shoot for self-actualization, you have to do the work yourself and not just rely on other people for your happiness.
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YOU DON'T WANT TO SETTLE
Settling seems to be a trend nowadays, especially in this culture of pop influence and peer pressure. Women are almost always the target of such pressure. We are constantly reminded that "the clock is ticking", and that if we don't marry and have babies at a certain age, we never will.
Maybe you just don't want to settle. Not everyone gets to be with their soulmate or their 'happily ever after'. You've worked hard to get to where you are now, and you know what you want. Sure, this means that you're being picky, but then again, there's no need to rush when choosing a lifetime partner. Unless you're 99-100% sure about him, you're not about to settle! Whether he comes along or not, you're going to be happy with yourself regardless.
YOU'RE HAPPY BY YOURSELF
People who are single by choice are always viewed with suspicion whenever they say that they are happy by themselves. Somehow, they don't believe it to be possible. However, the truth is, being single doesn't mean being lonely.
You have people in your life. You have great friends, a supportive family- people who love you. You are alone, but only in the context of a paired-up ecosystem. Otherwise, you are rarely by yourself. Whenever you are, you're comfortable with your own company.
YOU'RE EMBRACING LIFE
Life is full of opportunities. People who choose to be single get to live life to the fullest. They can say yes to everything, and they almost always do things on their own terms. This means getting all the advantages life has to offer without any restrictions.
IT'S A CHOICE
It's not a curse to be single. Sometimes, people make comments that are too ridiculous to even warrant a response. Being single is a choice of lifestyle. It doesn't mean that you don't date casually from time to time. It only means that you are choosing to not be in a long-term committed relationship.
Of course, this doesn't mean that you are staying out of committed relationships to justify your promiscuity. You are the farthest from promiscuous women. They are in need of tons of validation, hence the speed flirting.
You are not heartbroken, and you don't have 'issues' that you need to deal with. Neither are you just waiting for your Mr. Right. No. There is nothing wrong with you.
You are strong, independent, complete, and happy, and you choose to remain so for the foreseeable future.
WHAT DOES SINGLE BY CHOICE JUST NOT MY CHOICE MEAN?
This means that you are single, not because you choose to be single. Other people want you to remain single instead. It could be your parents, your friends, your religion, and various other reasons that prevent you from engaging in any form of relationship.
IS BEING SINGLE A CHOICE?
Yes. Some people choose to be single. These are the strong, independent, well-adjusted, happy people who are comfortable with their own company. However, not all people choose to be single. Some are so due to circumstance- most usually a broken heart.
IS STAYING SINGLE A GOOD IDEA?
Yes, it can be. Especially if you want to take some time to be with yourself and by yourself. Self-discovery is not easy. It takes time and effort to soul-search. If you wish to improve yourself and find your happiness, it would be a good idea to be single for this.
CAN WE BE SINGLE FOREVER?
Yes, this is also possible. Even though people are social animals, some actually prefer to be alone without feeling lonely. These are the people who are already happy with themselves that having a partner seems redundant. They probably will be single forever.
WHAT ARE THE BENEFITS OF BEING SINGLE?
Some benefits of being single include the freedom to do everything you want to do and everything that life offers you. There is no need to rely on someone else or to ask for their permission. There is also no need to seek their approval. You have all the space in the world to grow.
SINGLE BY CHOICE, NOT BY CHANCE MEANING
Single by choice just not by chance means there is ample opportunity presented to you to marry or be in a relationship, and you chose not to engage in them. It means that there is no other reason for your being single except that it's your choice to remain so.
Nicole Graham is a relationship expert at Womenio.com. She is helping women grow into their best selves so they can be confident and bring more love, passion, and purpose to their lives. Nicole enjoys studying the psychology of love and is passionate about writing on them. She offers helpful tips and advice to help overcome any relationship issue, whether you’re single or already in a relationship.
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