Do you feel like you are always hornier than your boyfriend? Don't worry; there is nothing wrong with being horny. It's normal to have a higher sex drive than your partner at times. But if it becomes an issue for you and your relationship, then it's time to find out what's going on.
Some reasons why you're hornier could include your boyfriend's less sex drive, which in turn could be caused by something else. Or it could be an increase in your sexual appetite.
Here are the reasons why you might be hornier than your boyfriend, as well as the explanations for these reasons.
Reasons Why Your Boyfriend Could Have Less Sex Drive
Contrary to popular belief, most men aren't sex machines. Sure, it indeed takes precious little to turn them on, but it is equally true that sometimes, men stop having sex because of what they're thinking.
Emotions aren't men's strong suit. Guys don't have the same benefit of being emotionally sensitive beings by design. They tend to bottle their feelings, and whenever it becomes full, they either explode or turn into a more passive version of themselves, which is probably why he may be avoiding intimacy with you.
Related: How to Tease a Guy (And Make Him Beg for More)
If he's angry or resentful, he will also likely withhold sex with you. This is especially true for guys who don't like to talk things through to resolve them. This allows his resentment and other negative emotions to take root, and it can act as a barrier to sex over time.
Some men also get too afraid or too tired to risk intimacy with anyone ever again. These are the men who probably experienced being hurt before. It could also be that they're experiencing some sort of emotionally draining problems such as work insecurity, financial instability, as well as relationship pressure. This causes them to feel a general sense of ambivalence towards the whole act.
If you want to have a lot of sex with your man, try to turn him on by understanding him and what he's going through. Also, try not to pressure him by being too aggressive and learn when to be supportive. Once he realizes that you're not judging him harshly and that you are, in fact, empathetic, he will likely become more inclined to engage in sex with you.
What Can Cause An Unexpected Increase In Libido?
There is no such thing as a measurement for libido. However, we feel what we feel. So if you feel a lot friskier, and if you've been craving a lot more sex than usual, you probably had a libido increase.
One reason why this happens is your low stress level. You probably only felt this way because you've been a lot less stressed and emotionally charged. If you're more relaxed than usual, it makes for a better sexual appetite.
Another reason could be a person's mental health. People who suffer from mental stress caused by repressive families, or religious zeal, are usually very disconnected from their sexual drive. Once this stress is lifted, however, they will probably feel hornier.
If you're having a good time sexually, this could also account for your increased sexual appetite. Once you engage in energetic and mind-blowing experiences, your body will crave more of it.
In addition, certain medications such as antidepressants and birth control are known to squash libido. This means that if you recently stopped taking these drugs or perhaps swapped them with something a little less intense, it could be the reason why you're hornier.
Or it could be because of hormones. Women generally feel a lot hornier just before, during, or after ovulation. So if you're feeling hornier than your boyfriend, check your calendar before you start to freak out.
What To Do When You Are Hornier Than Your Boyfriend
If you want to deal with this situation productively, you will have to either have a lot more patience and understanding or experiment and find alternatives.
You can always try to empathize with your boyfriend. Try to imagine yourself in his situation. Be supportive of his plight. Don't be judgemental or aggressive; that won't help.
Remember, don't take things personally. You have to realize that not everything is about you. He's probably just going through some stuff right now. It's not a rejection, even when it feels like one.
To quench your thirst, you can use some of your feminine toys. If you don't have any, it's a good time to get some. Besides that, you can always use your hands to pleasure yourself.
You could also take in consideration an open relationship or polyamory as a solution. But keep in mind that this can be very complicated and may not work well for everyone.
Since relationships aren't one-way streets, he has to try to reach out to you halfway, too. You can't always be understanding when he doesn't explain, after all. So try to find a way to make him open up with you.
You can also help your boyfriend overcome his natural desire to keep things to himself, especially his feelings, out of shame. Let him know that you're not going to just take "I'm tired" as an answer all the time. Make him understand that you feel guilty trying to initiate sex with him and that this is not a good thing.
Experimenting seems like a good way to reignite his sex drive. If you try to do other stuff you've dreamed about doing but haven't yet, this could do the trick.
You can even try taking charge if you haven't yet before.
The best and most straightforward way to deal with this situation, though, is to talk. Communication is always the key to a better relationship, as well as for better sex life. If you speak to him about how his refusals affect your self-esteem, he will probably want to explain to you why he's being that way.
Nicole Graham is a relationship expert at Womenio.com. She is helping women grow into their best selves so they can be confident and bring more love, passion, and purpose to their lives. Nicole enjoys studying the psychology of love and is passionate about writing on them. She offers helpful tips and advice to help overcome any relationship issue, whether you’re single or already in a relationship.
Leave a Reply