"Absence makes the heart grow fonder." This saying is popular because of its truth. Once a guy misses you, it means your absence has punched a hole into his life. Does that automatically mean that he will then, subsequently, fall in love with you?
Well, it does mean that there is a distinct possibility that he will. The fact that he misses you means that you are an important part of his life and that when you left, he felt your absence acutely.
He could want you back, or he could decide to walk on and leave his baggage behind. The fact is, there is no certainty when it comes to matters of the heart. However, let's try to see if we can answer the question, "Do guys fall in love when they miss you?".
He Needs To Choose You
It all boils down to choice. It doesn't matter how much we believe in destiny or love quotes and such. There is no trumping choice.
Your man can miss you like crazy all day, month, or year. However, if he chooses to do nothing about it, then he's down for the count. Yes, the fact that he misses you is a big tell.
It means he is emotionally attached to you. He could drown himself in work or by partying hard. He can even date other girls, but it won't matter. If he misses you, it means he cares. It also means that he feels intensely connected to you.
All this points to a very good possibility of him falling in love with you. But the question remains, "Will he do something about it?"
What's the point in missing someone if you don't tell them, right? Or if you don't show them how much you miss them? If you don't do something about the distance (both physical and emotional) that has caused such feelings of distress?
His choice matters. At the end of the day, he needs to choose to fall in love with you.
Related: Should I tell him I miss him so much?
The Right Love At The Right Time
The situation is also important. It is vital to put everything into context. The path can only become clearer if you have all the details. Only then can we answer the question properly.
There can be plenty of circumstances that could either be favorable or not to you. If your man misses you, it means he feels something for you. But will he fall in love with you? It depends...
He could be married. He can miss you for ten years, but he will never allow himself to fall all the way in love with you while he's married. For one, you'll both be hurt in the long run. For another, he will also hurt his wife and family. There is no happily ever after if you have to hurt other people to get it.
You could be taken. Waiting games are no fun at all. Even if he misses you and he would very much like to fall in love with you, self-preservation will dictate that he can't. Waiting for you to break up with your partner is the same as wishing you ill. If he truly feels something for you, he will never do that.
He could be in an emotional turmoil. Loving someone can be dangerous, especially if you have a lot of baggage. Perhaps he is still hung up over his ex, which is why he can't allow himself to fall in love with someone else. Perhaps he needs a little more me time to become a marginally better human being.
Etc.
There could be a lot of reasons why he will or will not fall in love with you, even though he misses you like crazy.
How to Make Guys Fall In Love When They Miss You
You have to play your cards right. You want him to miss you so badly that he comes back to you.
How, you ask? Here are the top ways to do it:
Make Yourself Scarce
There's this Economics Principle of Scarcity that explains it a lot better than anything else. You see, when something becomes scarce, then the demand for it increases. This is why the value of paintings and other art pieces goes up once their artists die.
It seems unfair, but yes, that's how the world works. Since they're not around to produce more of their excellent work, the value of their existing work will increase. The same way your man will miss you and pine for you more once you walk away.
This doesn't mean that you have to run away at times to keep your relationship exciting. It only means that you have to take a step back, every now and then, to keep him on his toes.
This rule is especially useful if you are in a new relationship. Try not to be too available. Being up for anything anytime will only lead to him taking your presence for granted.
So if you want to push his feelings off of the tipping point, you can always allow yourself time and space to breathe and to look at things objectively. This will not only help him realize your importance, but it will also help you put things into perspective.
Leave Something For Yourself
No matter how many people tell you that you become one with the person you love, try not to take it to heart. It is essential to leave something for yourself. This doesn't mean that you need to be selfish in your relationship.
It means that you need to love yourself enough to be your own person, even when you are in a relationship. So if you need to spend time with yourself, go ahead and do so. Don't worry too much about being apart from your partner. Just let him know that you need a little me-time to feel more like yourself.
Make Him Feel Needed
Being a strong, independent woman means that you know that you cannot do everything by yourself and that you cannot survive alone. You need other people to thrive.
Naturally, this means that if you decide to take on a man, you cannot make the relationship all about you, your independence, your strength, and your pride. He needs you. And you need him. Admit it. And make him feel it.
If you make him feel needed in the relationship and trigger his hero instinct, it will satisfy his innate sense to be the protector in your little bubble. And when you're gone, he will be forced to think about you and how you're doing and coping without him.
He will miss you, and he might even be forced to admit that he has fallen in love with you. Needing someone's presence is very potent.
Leave Yourself Behind
Just because you're going doesn't mean all your stuff has to go, too. You can leave some of the most innocuous stuff behind, like your hair tie, on the bedside table.
It's basically you marking your territory, yes. But it's also forcing him to think of you in the middle of the day. Men can be a little dense, sometimes. It won't hurt to remind them, every now and then, to pay attention, and to miss you.
Once he sees your hair tie, he will remember how much you like to tie your hair when you're about to dive into work (for example). And then he'll miss having to cook for you when you're busy. This thought will lead to another thought until it culminates in him finally calling you to tell you how much he misses you.
You can also make use of his amazing olfactory sense by making sure to leave your scent behind. Spritz some of that perfume you like so much in the bedroom, and maybe leave him your favorite bottle of shampoo. This way, every time he uses it he will be reminded of you and how your hair smells good all the time.
Don't just leave him memories. Remind him about you every chance you get. That way, he'll miss you more. And once he misses you, who knows what will happen, eh?
Be Patient
Patience is necessary when dealing with men. You can't force him to fall in love with you. You can only wait until he catches up (or not). Just the fact that you're willing to wait for him will go in your favor.
Don't be in his face about your feelings. Give him time and space enough to miss you and to figure out what to do about it. Forcing him to act on it doesn't count. He has to do it of his own accord.
At the same time, give yourself some time and space enough to put your feelings and his into perspective. Make sure you understand yourself enough to know and to be sure that you really love him as well.
So don't pester him about it, especially if he's not receptive. Chill. You've played your cards. You won't regret anything because you have already tried your best.
What's important is that you remain steadfast in your love. And if that means giving him space or letting him go, you should do it.
Related: Signs your ex is missing you after breakup
FAQ
What do guys do when they miss you?
Guys are pretty obvious creatures. If your man misses you, he will call you and send you texts, even when he normally hates sending texts. He will even splurge and send you an emoji, which is uncharacteristic.
What does a man think when he falls in love?
He will stop thinking just for himself and start wondering about how his love would feel about things and such. He'll become more thoughtful, as well as more susceptible to compromise. He will also be respectful, as well as trusting. He will care for her, and he will also give her enough independence to be herself, instead of just an extension of him.
Why do guys fall in love in a woman's absence?
Guys fall in love in a woman's absence because once she's gone, he will have nothing but time and space enough to miss her and to wonder what and how she's doing. His love will especially bloom when he misses her. Her absence makes her value increase in his mind. He will be able to think about how much she loves him and about how happy and secure that makes him feel.
Does giving him space make him fall in love?
It depends on several things- his choice, the circumstance, and your willingness to help him tip over the edge and fall in love with you. It's not fool-proof, but then again, you'll never know unless you try. If you give him space, he could forget about you, or he could miss you and love you more. Anything could happen.
How do you know if a man is falling for you?
He will tell you he misses you. He will also think about you, even when he's busy. He will find ways to make you happy and will go out of his way to put a smile on your face. He respects you and your boundaries, as well as your opinions and beliefs (even when you differ). He will trust you enough to make your own choices and will be there to support you in all of your endeavors.
What does a man want in a woman?
A man wants a woman who can be his life partner. Someone independent, and at the same time, caring and affectionate. Someone who can take care of herself but also needs him enough for him to feel useful and needed in her life. She will have to be strong and supportive of him, the same way he is also supportive of her.
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