It seems to be a general opinion that cuddling is reserved only for couples in a committed relationship and people who undeniably love each other. After all, the basic rule of Friends With Benefits (FWB) is to not act like a couple, and cuddling is such a couple thing to do.
But the notion that it’s reserved only for committed relationships can be a bit too overbearing. Cuddling is a very human thing to do, and, understandably, we can’t seem to get enough of it. It just feels so good, especially while still overpouring with happy hormones just right after an intimate encounter.
- Is it wrong to cuddle if you’re friends with benefits?
- Is cuddling after sexy time in friends with benefits setup crossing a line?
- Is it weird that friends with benefits cuddle more than they sleep together?
- We always cuddle after sexy time. Does it mean we have to take it to the next level?
Is it wrong to cuddle if you’re friends with benefits?
The answer is– not necessarily– because it would depend on the setup you both agreed upon.
When you shouldn’t be cuddling
If both of you agreed to not catch any feelings for each other and to keep it casual strictly, then you shouldn’t be cuddling with each other at all. It’s the number one rule of a successful FWB: don’t give them warm fuzzies.
While cuddling is totally normal, it can be a way to develop an intimate connection with another person. This means that if you do it often with your FWB, you may end up catching feelings for this person.
When you should be cuddling
If you never had that agreement, and both of you just built a habit of randomly going in for cuddles. You can rest easy, relax, and enjoy the moment. There’s nothing wrong with cuddling, let alone with someone you feel comfortable with. There’s no need to deprive yourself of these good old warm fuzzies.
It’s totally normal for FWB, or anyone for that matter, to cuddle after sexual activity, especially since the happy hormones are still overpouring in our system.
Is cuddling after sexy time in friends with benefits setup crossing a line?
If you mean overstepping the other person’s boundaries by crossing a line, then it may be. Especially if the partner already said that it’s something they’re uncomfortable with.
If you never really talked about cuddling, it’s best to ask for their consent first before going in for cuddles. That way, you’ll know if there’s no offense made at all.
Is it weird that friends with benefits cuddle more than they sleep together?
It can be weird, especially since FWB usually has more fornication than cuddles. But the definite answer would depend on the boundaries you set in your FWB setup.
But if you consider cuddles as one of the main ‘benefits’ you expect to get from your setup, then doing it more often than sleeping together doesn’t sound weird at all.
We always cuddle after sexy time. Does it mean we have to take it to the next level?
Well, do you want to take it to the next level? As I said, cuddling is totally normal, FWB or not, especially after the act. It’s not something unique to committed couples. Humans naturally crave cuddles.
And so, the answer to this question would depend on how you feel about the setup. Do you feel like there is a need to take it to the next level? Or are you content with the relationship that you share right now? You should ask yourself "do I like him" and answer it honestly.
It is important to realize that being FWB isn’t just about two people sleeping together and then getting dressed and leaving right away (although some FWB strictly stick to that setup).
Being in this kind of setup can also mean that you share little moments with each other, like cuddling as genuine friends who really understand each other.
As long as there is consent, and if both parties agree to enjoy such moments of comfort without breaking any rules of your setup, then cuddling among FWB relationships should definitely be guilt-free.